Exactly one year ago today, I was at a swanky industry gala, drinking champagne, laughing with friends, enjoying a lovely dinner at the Reagan Library. I was wearing a pink dress from The Limited that I had bought years ago, and I remember tweeting about what a lucky gal I was to be able to dress up and attend galas and balls and call it all “work.”
Unbeknownst to me that a few hours later, would be the mark of the end of my ten and a half year marriage.
There are moments when I long to be that girl again. A little rough around the edges of from life, carrying some baggage and a chip on her shoulder, but still trusting, still a bit naive, secure and confident.
That girl died in an instant on Sept 21st, 2011 and another was reborn.
This new girl fears being alone.
She is constantly searching for something.
She is sometimes confused and a little lost.
She is more cynical and less trusting.
This new girl is strong.
She is experiencing life.
She is making mistakes but is okay with that.
She is may be broken but is not shattered.
She has goals, hopes and she dreams.
She is alive.
Today marks the one year anniversary of my beginning. I’m proud of that girl for having the strength to walk away from almost everything and starting all over. Today, I may be insecure, unsure of myself and of what tomorrow holds, I may not truly know who I am, and I may be scarred, confused and scared, but I wouldn’t trade back for anything in the world.