I Need a Purpose…Or A Project…Or Something.

It’s 4 am and apparently, it’s my optimal writing time. My only writing time.

I can’t sleep and when I can’t sleep, I sometimes find myself writing. And here I am.

The last few months, among the busyness of travel for work, I’ve become more and more aware of the fact that apart from work, I don’t really “do” anything. I don’t really have a purpose outside of working hard at a job and company I love. I spend my weekends either reading on my couch or hanging out, but nothing that I’m working toward, no major goals, no motivation,¬†and few friends. This, of course, has been of my own choosing. I’ve enjoyed much of this time and have orchestrated such a time to just be. Yet, now, the time has come to start something, get clear on some goals, and live with more purpose.

But what would that be?

I tend to have a 2-2.5 year attention span on things where I devote and dedicate my time and energy on a sole task or purpose. And then I roughly burn out on it and I’m back to trying something new. My previous stints have included:

  • Running
  • Writing/blogging daily
  • Photography
  • Toastmasters
  • Being a stay-at-home mom
  • College

Though I still do many of these things (well, I’m not a stay-at-home mom anymore, but I’m close and I’m definitely NOT in college anymore), they no longer consume me. I’m not passionate about them and it’s doubtful that I ever will be again. Though I still enjoy them and I believe I always will, it seems that the nature of the beast is that these hobbies/activities/interests have run their course.

So, what’s next? Ballroom dancing? No. Gardening? Negative. Cooking? Shoot me now. A quick Google search has also come up empty.

All I know is that sitting in sweatpants at home and doing nothing has been great and very much needed, but it’s time for a change. It’s almost the new year so in the next few weeks, it’s time to set some new goals and maybe pick up a new skill or two.

What are your goals for 2019?

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