I woke up this morning feeling no different than I did yesterday (Well, maybe a bit less tired since I finally got a good, full night’s sleep). The only thing different is that I no longer am checking the 35-39 age group box, but the 40-44 will now be my go-to.
40 years old. When you still remember how it felt to meet someone 40 when you were in your teens, your twenties, and even early thirties and think, wow, 40 is old af. And now, here I am. In some ways, though I feel exactly the same, so many things have changed. Not due to the fact that I’m that much closer to a senior citizen discount, but I feel like I am wiser, more settled, no longer wandering, but intentional about life, on a path toward purpose and not just trying to survive each day. I haven’t had that feeling for a very long time – at least 5 years, maybe 10, maybe never. I dunno – they say the memory is the first to go…
Maybe it’s because I knew this milestone was approaching, or perhaps it’s because once you hit the next era, you’re infused with next level wisdom, but these past few weeks brought much introspection and sagacity; and a few “Come to Jesus” moments – physically, mentally, and emotionally.
Every day, I try to practice gratitude, but just like when the world embarks upon a new year on January 1st, on September 5th, I am not only reminded of my many, many, many blessings, I make a set of goals (41 by 41 coming soon!) and create an intention for this next trip around the sun. I guess this is when you know you’re getting wiser.
I just returned from a long weekend celebration in Vegas with some great friends. There was a perfect mix of deep conversations, shenanigans, tattoos – and I wasn’t hungover once. And now as I sit in the silence of my living room, while my family sleeps in, I am infused with gratitude about my life, the people that are in it, and the direction I am headed. Ten years ago, I would’ve never pictured myself divorced, living in an apartment by the beach and 40, feeling happier and more secure than I was back then with what the world told me was security – a house, a husband, a retirement fund, and life insurance. Wisdom and life have shown me that I have the most important things now – a solid relationship, a small but mighty circle of real friends, I am surrounded by people who push me to be better, my loved ones are healthy, I finally have self-awareness and self-respect. I am wealthy beyond compare and it has nothing to do with the number in my bank account or the number of my Facebook friends.
Some people freak out when they hit a milestone year because they are “getting old.” Well, I’m never getting old. I’ll be young at 40 and I’ll still be young at 80. 40 feels right. It’s a good place to be and I know I’m on the precipice of abundance, with new and exciting opportunities and experiences still to come.
If you’re reading this, even if we’ve never met or spoken to each other, thank you for being a part of my life and a part of my journey.